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Some have been disguised as senior citizens taking a bus trip to buy cheap Canadian prescription drugs. After catching a half- dozen young vegans in blue-hair wig disguises, Canadian immigration authorities began stopping buses and quizzing the supposed senior citizens about Perry Como and Rosemary Clooney to prove that they were alive in the '50s. "If they can't identify the accordion player on The Lawrence Welk Show, we become very suspicious about their age," an official said.Canadian citizens have complained that the illegal immigrants are creating an organic-broccoli shortage, buying up all the Barbara Streisand c.d.'s, and renting all the Michael Moore movies. "I really feel sorry for American liberals, but the Canadian economy just can't support them," an Ottawa resident said. "How many art-history majors does one country need?"These are from a reader ... enjoy:A shoe repair shop: We will heel you We will save your sole We will even dye for you.A sign over a Gynecologists'. I know I need to get up; I have a lecture to present to another new group of bored young adults. None of them want to be there, it makes me wonder why I bother turning up. I drag myself out of bed and into a cold shower; I eat a bowl of cornflakes, dress and drive to work. The only thing motivating me was the hope of getting laid that night. It’d been unbearably long since my last fuck, I’d just got out of a long since dead almost sexless relationship. Perhaps in this new class I could find myself some young pussy.I was delivering my lecture when this one girl caught my eye, a pretty little thing. Her tits were the first thing I noticed, in her pink vest top they hung so nicely. She was clearly not wearing a bra. Her ankle length wrap around skirt exposing a little of her thigh, I wondered if her bra was the only underwear she didn’t bother with…I could see the way she was looking at me too, what was it about girls with young men in suits? Half the female population of the auditorium.
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